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Computer Help Desk - FUNNY

This is a true story from the WordPerfect help line. Needless to say, the help desk employee was fired; however, he is currently suing the WordPerfect organization for "Termination without Cause".

Actual dialog of a former Word perfect Customer Support employee:

"Ridge Hall computer assistant; may I help you?"

"Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect."

"What sort of trouble?"

"Well, I was just typing along, and all of a sudden the words went away."

"Went away?"

"They disappeared."

"Hmm. So what does your screen look like now?"



"It's blank; it won't accept anything when I type."

"Are you still in WordPerfect, or did you get out?"

"How do I tell?"

"Can you see the C: prompt on the screen?"
"What's a sea-prompt?"

"Never mind. Can you move the cursor around on the screen?"

"There isn't any cursor: I told you, it won't accept anything I type."

"Does your monitor have a power indicator?"

"What's a monitor?"

"It's the thing with the screen on it that looks like a TV. Does it have a little light that tells you when it's on?"

"I don't know."

"Well, then look on the back of the monitor and find where the power cord goes into it. Can you see that?"

"Yes, I think so."

"Great. Follow the cord to the plug, and tell me if it's plugged into the wall."

".......Yes, it is."

"When you were behind the monitor, did you notice that there were two cables plugged into the back of it, not just one?"


"Well, there are. I need you to look back there again and find the other cable."
".......Okay, here it is."

"Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer."

"I can't reach."

"Uh huh. Well, can you see if it is?"


"Even if you maybe put your knee on something and lean way over?"

"Oh, it's not because I don't have the right angle - it's because it's dark."


"Yes - the office light is off, and the only light I have is coming in from the window."

"Well, turn on the office light then."

"I can't."

"No? Why not?"

"Because there's a power outage."

"A power... A power outage? Aha, Okay, we've got it licked now. Do you still have the boxes and manuals and packing stuff your computer came in?"

"Well, yes, I keep them in the closet."

"Good. Go get them, and unplug your system and pack it up just like it was when you got it. Then take it back to the store you bought it from."

"Really? Is it that bad?"

"Yes, I'm afraid it is."

"Well, all right then, I suppose. What do I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to own a computer."


Blogger Wally Banners said...

when im hit the last line i fell down roaring and lmao so bad ty!!!!

3:17 AM

Blogger Fuckkit said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

11:25 AM

Blogger Fuckkit said...

Heh heh, luvs it ;)

11:25 AM

Anonymous Korean Celt said...

You can't fire someone for being truthful, now can you?

9:43 AM

Blogger madbull said...

Fuc*ing hell, I am sys admin at a big international IT help desk. I would pmake every help desk employee 'Employee of the month' for this. LMFAO.

6:31 PM

Anonymous Paul said...

Hehe, I've heard that one before. Still funny though.

9:59 PM

Blogger Jenn of the Jungle said...

Now, that's funny.

4:22 PM

Anonymous Jess said...

I'm willing to bet that this does have a basis in truth at least. It does seem very contrived but after hearing about some of the customers that a friend of mine has to deal with, I could definitely believe it. The worst he got was someone who was trying to connect his tower to his television and just would not listen to sense. You would have thought that a computer degree, Microsoft courses, CCNA courses and goodness knows what else would protect you from the opinions of idiots but apparently not.

5:35 AM


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